Allow Me To {Re}Introduce Myself Part I

Hi.  I'm Lela.

Here is what I look like:

I just graduated on May 11th from a small liberal arts college in New England.

While in school, I double majored in Dance and Theatre:

              {I know. I wore some weird shit.}

I also spent a lot of time {as in all of my "free" time} doing tech and learning stage combat:

{It was pretty awesome}

College was amazing.  I learned so much - which I know is the point of higher education. And I was an avid consumer of everything my faculty shared with me in the classroom, taking 20+ credits at a time. I improved my technique as a performer and artist, explored new horizons within myself as well as in the world around me, and pursued new avenues.  Between all the classes, rehearsals, auditions, performances, the voice lessons, the three-on-campus jobs, the a capella group, etc. etc. I was really busy and kind of a bad blogger.  But blogging has always been something I love: something I turn to as a further form of creativity and inspiration.  Of release and exploration.  Simply put, I love telling stories: and words were invented, I think, just for that purpose.  So I'm reintroducing myself to the blogging world: a new venture for me to more seriously commit to moving forward.  

It's a pleasure to meet you!

Freshman Fears, Senior Year.

Today is July 1st.  Not a date I expected to have mixed feelings about but, well, there you have it. My summer is, basically, halfway through.  I know many families with kids still in elementary and even high school are just beginning their summers, but for me I was done back in May and return at the beginning of September.  So the first of July marks the halfway point.

Part of me is very pleased with that thought - woo hoo!  Almost time to go back to school, to awesome roommates and a beautiful apartment and a super productive, overwhelmingly busy schedule.  Almost time for dance and dance studios and stages everywhere you look.   Almost time for regular voice lessons and half way to the Sunday I can sit in what has become "my" church after three years of attendance.

But part of me is sad, too.  Sad because I know the place I'm so excited to return to - the place I love so well - is just not going to be the same place any more. My new roommates are good friends, talented people, loyal, clever, beautiful, wonderful.  But they aren't Roomie.  And the apartment won't be the one we shared.  The thoughts I have of my school almost always include Marissa Jenna Sam Meg and Julia and my boys - my crazy, wild, silly, sweet boys who are actually older than me and graduated and won't be there any more for watching the game or The Scottish Play or convincing me tonight is as good a night as any to put down the homework and let my hair down.

And then there is the work itself. So much of it.  Just so, so much of it.  Including my voice lesson, I am taking 23 credits this semester alone.  Twenty-three credits. That's an entire year's worth of classes all jammed into a semester. . . plus my Independent Study.  And Senior Performance.  Those are at least two performances I'm guaranteed to be involved in, never mind Cabaret, Oklahoma!, and any of the other club-sponsored shows.  Or any clubs - Sisterhood, Vocal Conviction. . . plus my mandatory auditions as a Senior for dance companies.  And the "mock" auditions with professionals from a NYC Agency, who actually hire people every year (!!!).  And where in there will I find the time to *work*?  And if I don't work, how will I eat?  Or pay my cell phone bill, or for internet, or dancewear (which I haven't replaced/updated/bought since the summer before freshman year).

In a weird way, it feels again like the summer before Freshman year.  Though I do in fact know and love (really and truly and very much) people at school, without my seniors around me it feels almost as though I'll be around strangers again.  Will I be ok?  Will I have enough time to work?  Will I have enough food? Will the classes be too much for me?  How will I keep my grades up?  I'm scared.

I'm scared.

I'm scared.

There.  I said it. I admitted it. Something I've barely even allowed to whisper in the back of my mind but has wiggled in my belly anyway.  See, I'm almost never scared.  I'm *ready* or I'm *excited* or *prepared* or always *confident.*  I smile and say "I think I can handle it, no worries," and set off with a laugh for the impossible.  For the adventure.  And really, that part of me is more than there still - ready, excited, sure.  But part of me is a little frightened.  Daunted by how big the obstacles appear.  Nervous about whats on the other side.  Sad to have lost my favorite hands to hold along the way - even if only for a little while.

And so, my summer is halfway done.  I have another two months to work as hard as I can and save money to survive on, to prepare and organize my life.  To take a deep breath, put the smile on and say "I think I can handle it," to the impossible.

Here's to the adventure.  Let's set off laughing, shall we?

Today Is My First Day

Of Junior Year.  I have Honors Colloquium, Ballet, Dance Composition III, and Musical Theater Ensemble which will fill my day from 11:30 - 6:10.  Thank goodness for late starts!  My latest start ever!  Which of course means my roommate and I were up far too late attempting to unpack/decorate our lovely new space. . .

I promise I'll write again soon (hopefully tonight) to let you know how this first day went and to post pictures of this amazingly beautiful/awesome space. 

Wish me luck!

This Picture

 

This picture right here, is why I can't wait to go back to school:

Thats me, backstage at last fall's dramatic production.  The gentleman lifting me is one of my faculty members.  And this is a candid - because this is how we behave backstage.  All of us.  All the time.  

I want to go back to school, because the opportunities are amazing: above, we're all in costume for a performance of "Medea," one of the oldest - arguably the oldest - intact plays from the Western world.  The richness of the material we get to explore is wonderful.  And the "we," is wonderful as well.  In this picture there is a faculty member, a Sophomore Dance Major, and a Freshman Theatre Major and a Freshman Musical Theatre Major.  

But I want to go back because for the silliest, flimsiest, most frivolous reason of all.  Because it's fun.  Yes, I take lots of challenging classes and work very hard and rehearse everyday of the week.  I juggle multiple jobs, and a long distance relationship, and mounds of homework.  But I get to have fun while I'm at it.  

Lots and lots and lots of fun.  I miss all of my "college," friends, and even some of my Professors.  So while I'm quite sad my summer is wrapping up and goodbyes are in the works, I'm excited that my semester is soon beginning and "hellos," are around the corner.  

I have to go begin to pack (an arduous task I assure you).  But I've just stumbled across this photo, so I think I'll be able to do it with a smile.

Since Last I Wrote You:

I've been very very busy.  Isn't that always the case?  There was the weekend spent meeting Boyfriend's extended family, several days full of lobster, Apples to Apples (I'd never played!  It was so much fun!  Why had no one told me of this?), laughing, baked goods, and praying I'd remembered everyone's name/how they were related.

There was the panic when I realized how soon I go back to school.  Which is wonderful - I miss all of my amazing, ridiculous, talented, funny, and passionate friends.  I am ready for the push of gaining new knowledge, the challenge of mastering a new subject/class/task.  I miss my boss - I know, ridiculous right?  But you guys have never met him!  Awesome is an understatement.  I'm excited to live with a dear friend, in a tiny little school-provided apartment of our own, furnished with nothing but inventiveness and enthusiasm.  I'm ready to dance everyday, to have access to the (brand new!!!!) gym, to start the rehearsal process, meet the new faculty, try my hand again at choreographing, etc. etc. et. al.

But.  There is always a but, isn't there?  Goodbyes.  Long-distance.  No pets - no garden.  Homework.  Packing.  My Lord in heaven, the packing. . .

I've also been working - a full time job is, well, a full time job after all!  And what a job.  Kids and trampolines, emails and apples.  Waking up early and coming home with Goldfish-orange fingers, sunscreen scented skin, and grass stained jeans. 

Boyfriend & I celebrated our 2nd Anniversary.  We staid in and ate junk food and cuddled the dogs and watched movies.  It rained, and I was fighting a cold, so we had tea.  The best word I can thin of is "content."  With the moment, the relationship, the long-term future (because the short-term has some speed bumps ahead, sigh).

Oh, and he bought me a new camera.  To replace the one that was broken on my flight to Trinidad in the spring. 

So, since last I wrote, friends, I've been quite busy.  How about you?

Dear 2011, Let's Be Friends.

I am really excited for this year.  No seriously, I am!  I know every year people say the same things "This year is going to be my year."  "I am so excited to turn a new leaf!"  "Hooray for fresh starts!"  But this year really and truly does feel special to me.  There is just so much to look forward to.  So many things I'm excited to do and be part of.   Here is what I'm looking forward to in 2011.

Spring Semester 2011.  I know.  I know.  I really do know.  I am a giant dork - but I can't help being excited about my classes this semester.  I'm in Level 6 for both ballet and modern!  And I'll be taking Pointe Technique and variations.  I'm also supposed to drop in on Jazz 5 while I'm at it!  I'm curious about Dance Composition - everyone I talked to who had the faculty member I'll be learning from loved the class.  And I'm finally in Comparative Religions, a topic that I've always been interested in. . . and Honors Colloquium looks like an absolute ball.  I love the idea of the class, I love everyone I know I'll be taking the class with, and I love the Prof.  Perfect combination!

The Kennedy Center American College Theater Festival, usually called "the Kennedy Festival," or just "Festival."  It's a week long gathering of colleges and theater departments from all across the region.  Months before the actual festival, respondents are sent out to colleges and universities, to watch musicals and comedies, dramas, and tragedies.  The best of them are called to Festival to perform to large crowds and compete for the chance to go to the NATIONAL Festival.   The drama I was part of was held - meaning we're on the list of possible performers, and will be finding out soon if we get to compete!  There are workshops and master classes in every kind of stage craft you can imagine - stage combat, make up, etc.  There are mini-auditions for mini-productions.  There is a lot of laughing.  I am SO excited.

Two weddings.  The first one is this February, when this amazing couple tie the knot.  I know the ceremony will be a complete tear jerker, and I have seen the bride's dress.  It. Is. Stunning.

The bride for the second wedding is my life-long friend.  I've known her since before I can remember - and I am so excited for her mountain-top wedding to her Marine Corps sweetheart.  A sweet summer wedding for one of the sweetest - and toughest - women I've ever met.

Then there is Spring Break.  I have never in my life been outside the country, and this year I get to!  I am flying first class (thanks to some generous and loving relatives!) to Trinidad and Tobago for Carnival!  I'm going to be part of the street parading and celebrating as part of the band (meaning group, not musicians) Tribe.  This is my costume!  And I'll be spending the time with two of my closest girlfriends!

A few days later, I turn 21.  Not such a big deal, since I don't drink. . . but somehow, it still feels like an important, big girl, moment.

Hopefully, I'll be earning my Associate's Degree.  *Crosses Fingers*  I just have to sort out one last class.  One. Last. Class.

Finding out where I am spending the next four years.  Right now I've applied to Fordham University/the Ailey School, Barnard College, and my own current school.  I would be happy at any of the three, although right now Barnard and right-where-I-am are the most likely options.  It's a matter of finding out where I can get in, and what I can afford, and what will be the best option long term - financially, emotionally, etc.

Starting to rehearse with a real, professional company!

Getting more of my work published . . . I think it's about time I treat writing as well as I treat my other passions.

A summer job I'll love, taking care of two of the cutest children on the entire planet.

Hopefully celebrating another anniversary with Boyfriend.

Moving into a new house, with a new start.

What are YOU looking forward to in 2011?