She Said I Think I'll Go To Boston. . .

. . . I think I'll start a new life, I think I'll start it over, where no one knows my name.

-"Boston," by Augustana

So that's exactly what she did.  Hello there, friends.  I know, I know.  It's been awhile - months, on fact.  If you've ever read my blog before and are here now, faithfully checking in, I thank you.  Deeply and truly from the bottom of my heart for your loyalty to me and my little corner of the internet.  And if you're new, welcome!  I hope you'll stay around and share in the adventure.  I also think if you're a long time follower, it is time to be candid - and if you're new, it's always a good idea to start a relationship of any kind with real honesty, right?

So.  Where have I been?  What have I been doing for the past season, an entire summer, where I was silent?  And why didn't I blog?  Well, in case the lyrics weren't a give away, I was in Boston. Back in January I received an award at KCACTF (Region 1) for those who don't know, KCACTF is a  national College Theatre Festival, and the particular award I received was a scholarship that allowed me to train with Commonwealth Shakespeare Company, a renown company who I deeply admire.  To train, perform, and work with them for the summer was something I hoped for but didn't anticipate being able to actually do - and the second I realized I would be able to, I was elated.  The only downside was I knew I couldn't share too much of my experience here.

You see, blogs are public access things by their nature - and I have had to be very careful with what information I post publicly because of my "relationship," with my father, a topic I have hinted at on this blog before.  Simply put he was and is abusive, and it is always in my best interest (emotionally, mentally, and physically) for him not to know where I am located.  There was no way to talk about my apprenticeship, which was six or seven days a week, all day and all night, and even had me traveling around Boston, without talking about my exact location - our shows on the Common draw ten thousand people a night, so we're hardly small or unknown.  Which is exactly how he found me anyway.  And once he did, the court battle began, as I attempt to win legal protection from his harassment and stalking, something I knew I couldn't do if I made all of my information public.  I now have enough legal protection to feel comfortable sharing some of my information again. . . and to be honest, I missed this space.  I love to write and I love my blog and I am certainly resentful I had to be pulled away from it.  So expect me back!

Now about this summer - it was amazing.  There was some rough stuff for sure, but it was the most wonderful summer of my entire life. I trained intensively in my craft, performed for tens of thousands of people on the Boston Common, worked with actors from plays like London and Hollywood (we're talkin' an actor on NCIS LA here people!), got to tour Boston performing with the other Apprentices everywhere from a YMCA to George's Island, went to a ton of Sox games, couch surfed like a professional, saw Boston's first Pride Parade, participated in a major arts festival, had a crash course in all things outdoor theatre, grew immeasurably as an artist, learned to really stand on my own two feet, made friendships faster and more deeply than I imagined possible, worked with two dozen inspiring peers, and managed through the grace of God to parlay all of that in to job opportunities as an artist.  

More on those topics to follow! I hope you're all ready to read. 

I Made Another Blog.

I know.  I know I know I know I know!  I hardly have time to squeeze writing and sharing and posting good stuff on this blog (which I love so much).  Why would I ever go out and make another one?!?!?  Well, this other one is something I've been thinking about doing in some form or other for a long time now.  It's called I Want You To Know and it has a totally different theme and feel than A Space For Inspiration does.  You know how one of the goals I hold closest is the idea of starting a family/being a mom?  Well, this blog is about that.

Now before you panic, I am not pregnant.  I have no intentions of abandoning my collegiate career, my performance career, my grad school career, my wild and carefree youth (ok so it's a pretty tame and detail oriented youth, but you get the idea) or any of the rest of that sort of thing.  Marriage, kids, all that is a long time away for me still. . . which got me thinking.  I'm pretty young and I'm still learning new things everyday.  If I learn one new and valuable thing everyday for 365 days, and I'm ten years away from having kids, thats. . . well a lot more things than I can count right now.  So thats what this new blog is for.  To write down the things I learn that are important (or at least that I think are important right now).  To share images and thoughts and ideas and realizations and lessons that inspire me or help me grow as a person that I think might do the same for my (future) kids.

I couldn't do a journal or letters.  I'd loose them and my handwriting sucks.  So instead I am infringing on the blogosphere, taking up more than my fair share of space.  If you might be interested in what I have to say, or have advice to share, or just want to laugh at my mumbled musings, please check out I Want You To Know.

Thanks and love (can you tell I'm a wee bit embarrassed by myself?).

New Name?

So what do you all think of the new header?  Did you notice the big change?  Thats right, I bit the bullet and changed the name of this space . . . I think.  The URL will stay the same, because it's based on my name instead of hte blog's name (and it matches up with tumblr, etc.).  I decided the name of the blog needed a change for several reasons.  The first was I got inspired: for my dance composition class, we have to have these thigns called "special holy notebooks," which we are to carry on our person at all times.  These notebooks are for us to jot down our ideas - whatever inspires us, intrigues us, whatever we think is beautiful or interesting.  The idea is that we can later go back and create movement, phrases, dances, even whole concert-length works from our hastily jotted, visceral reactions to the world around us.  It's a pretty cool idea, and one that I'm familiar with not just as a dancer/choreographer but because it's a very common technique for authors.  Even actors do something similar, where they may right down interactions, descriptions, ideas that can help them later as they create new characters.  What I decided to do was buy one of those little index/flashcard things.  You know, the ones that re like mini spiral notebooks?  That way, it would be small enough to fit in my purse and when I filled it up, I could rip out the index cards with ideas I wanted to pursue and recycle the rest.  I was doodling on this "sacred, holy" notebook cover.  I wrote a bunch of words on the front: words like "movement," "imagery," "expression," "freedom," "creativity."  And int he center in purple I wrote "Inspiration."  It became "my place for Inspiration."  which is exactly whay this blog is for me.

It's where I go to vent, to talk, to feel inspired and encouraged.  It's where I like to share art and music and imagery that says something tome (and hopefully others).  It's a conduit for expression and free thinking.  It. too, is a space for inspiration.

What do you think?  Leave me feedback, I always love hearing what you have to say!

Dear 2011, Let's Be Friends.

I am really excited for this year.  No seriously, I am!  I know every year people say the same things "This year is going to be my year."  "I am so excited to turn a new leaf!"  "Hooray for fresh starts!"  But this year really and truly does feel special to me.  There is just so much to look forward to.  So many things I'm excited to do and be part of.   Here is what I'm looking forward to in 2011.

Spring Semester 2011.  I know.  I know.  I really do know.  I am a giant dork - but I can't help being excited about my classes this semester.  I'm in Level 6 for both ballet and modern!  And I'll be taking Pointe Technique and variations.  I'm also supposed to drop in on Jazz 5 while I'm at it!  I'm curious about Dance Composition - everyone I talked to who had the faculty member I'll be learning from loved the class.  And I'm finally in Comparative Religions, a topic that I've always been interested in. . . and Honors Colloquium looks like an absolute ball.  I love the idea of the class, I love everyone I know I'll be taking the class with, and I love the Prof.  Perfect combination!

The Kennedy Center American College Theater Festival, usually called "the Kennedy Festival," or just "Festival."  It's a week long gathering of colleges and theater departments from all across the region.  Months before the actual festival, respondents are sent out to colleges and universities, to watch musicals and comedies, dramas, and tragedies.  The best of them are called to Festival to perform to large crowds and compete for the chance to go to the NATIONAL Festival.   The drama I was part of was held - meaning we're on the list of possible performers, and will be finding out soon if we get to compete!  There are workshops and master classes in every kind of stage craft you can imagine - stage combat, make up, etc.  There are mini-auditions for mini-productions.  There is a lot of laughing.  I am SO excited.

Two weddings.  The first one is this February, when this amazing couple tie the knot.  I know the ceremony will be a complete tear jerker, and I have seen the bride's dress.  It. Is. Stunning.

The bride for the second wedding is my life-long friend.  I've known her since before I can remember - and I am so excited for her mountain-top wedding to her Marine Corps sweetheart.  A sweet summer wedding for one of the sweetest - and toughest - women I've ever met.

Then there is Spring Break.  I have never in my life been outside the country, and this year I get to!  I am flying first class (thanks to some generous and loving relatives!) to Trinidad and Tobago for Carnival!  I'm going to be part of the street parading and celebrating as part of the band (meaning group, not musicians) Tribe.  This is my costume!  And I'll be spending the time with two of my closest girlfriends!

A few days later, I turn 21.  Not such a big deal, since I don't drink. . . but somehow, it still feels like an important, big girl, moment.

Hopefully, I'll be earning my Associate's Degree.  *Crosses Fingers*  I just have to sort out one last class.  One. Last. Class.

Finding out where I am spending the next four years.  Right now I've applied to Fordham University/the Ailey School, Barnard College, and my own current school.  I would be happy at any of the three, although right now Barnard and right-where-I-am are the most likely options.  It's a matter of finding out where I can get in, and what I can afford, and what will be the best option long term - financially, emotionally, etc.

Starting to rehearse with a real, professional company!

Getting more of my work published . . . I think it's about time I treat writing as well as I treat my other passions.

A summer job I'll love, taking care of two of the cutest children on the entire planet.

Hopefully celebrating another anniversary with Boyfriend.

Moving into a new house, with a new start.

What are YOU looking forward to in 2011?