The Music & The Mirror

For those of you who don't know, the title of the post comes from a beautiful song of the same name from the musical A Chorus Line.  In this number the lead character declares "God I'm a dancer - a dancer dances!" and explains how the only things in life she ever needs are "the music, and the mirror, and the chance to dance for you."

In that moment, I feel for Cassie.  I understand exactly what she means - because I feel the same need, the same urge to move that has my feet tapping and my heart racing and my very bones aching if I sit still too long.  If I go overlong without singing enough notes, I can feel my throat tighten and I get grouchy, listless, bored.  Without a character to painstakingly create and build and loose myself in, I become so antsy I irritate even myself.  I was nervous at the thought of a summer spent this way - with no "home dance studio" anymore, no money for voice lessons, and not much access to theatre where I live, it didn't seem likely I'd be performing or creating very much.

But my fears were proved wrong by a wonderful chance to perform!  I'm part of a community theatre's production of "Aida."  It's a beautiful show and a talented cast and a well respected theatre, so that alone is a great opportunity.  I'm part of the Trio of Dancers in our production, who like the Trio in the Broadway production narrate and enhance the story through dances to instrumental music through out the score. The Trio often take the lead during the ensemble dances, and portray various ensemble roles.  Additionally we're part of the Prologue and Epilogue sequences, set in a modern day museum with all of the key characters intermingling and forming connections.  During the Prologue, the audience doesn't realize the crowd is composed of the lead characters - but when the Epilogue comes, they've met everyone and are aware of their roles/connections/etc.  It's one of my favorite bits of stage magic and I'm quite excited to be a part of it!

And perhaps even more excitingly, I have been given a wonderful opportunity to perform a solo in this production!  The way our director has decided to stage one of the dance sequences, it will be danced by a soloist in an exotic costume, en pointe.  I almost cried I was so excited when he informed us at the Read Through that soloist would  be me!  Me, my pointe shoes, and a live band alone on the stage. . . what more could I want? Because stereotypical as it is to say, performing is my life. The practice studios and rehearsal halls are my home, with their cool barres and familiar smells of rosin, tea with lemon, tiger balm, and honey, the ancient creaking of floors a thousand feet have danced on, the solemn black music stands waiting to be burdened with librettos.  The dark curtained wings are my horizon, a strange mix of heavy red velvets and blinding yellow lights - and beyond them lies my entire world.  The stage.  Without songs to sing and steps to dance and characters to breathe life into, I am certain I'd have gone mad.  Now, I am going home instead.

Getting Lucky

"Luck is what happens when preparation meets opportunity."

Today was my first day off in ages and ages and ages.  As usual, it's been a busy semester full of classes, work (I got some extra hours this week!  Woo hoo!), and rehearsals which I love!  However it can sometimes be a little exhausting.  For example, here is my typical Monday:

7:00 am, I drag myself out of bed and into clean clothes, etc.  Grab my bags and books and stumble off to. . .

8:00 am Pedagogy class which goes until

9:30 am at which point I go to job #1 in Advising.  I file, make appointments, take messages, and otherwise hold down the front desk until

10:50 when my voice lesson starts.  Voice ends just in time for me to get to 

11:30 Modern 6

1:00 lunch with my roommate

1:30 twenty minutes at the gym before

1:50 Dramatic Literature, which is only an hour long so I get out by 2:50 giving me exactly enough time to go to

3:00 Physical Therapy for an hour and fifteen minutes, getting me out at 4:15 so by

4:40 I'm in Jazz 6 which ends at 6:10, which is convenient since

6:15 is when Hairspray rehearsal starts, which runs until 10:30

10:45 back in my room to start homework which takes me until 12:30ish to complete and call Boyfriend.

Then it's off to bed by 1ish, so I can get up, rinse, and repeat.  The classes change, the length of time at the gym changes (someday I get in almost an hour!) but thats about it.  It's a busy and fulfilling life, to be sure.  I love it.  Which is why today, on my first day off, I spent it making sure I could continue living almost the exact same way.  I edited my resume and started sending off copies of my headshot, (adjusted) resume, and contact information to local theaters/playhouses/summer stock companies.  I researched different performance venues and internships - all of which is work I should have done ages ago, but couldn't because of this stupid hip injury.  I didn't know when or if I'd be ok enough to rehearse/perform this summer.  If I'm lucky, though, I'll get some performances and some additional work to go along with my day job!

Cross you fingers, blogging world - I'm looking for my lucky break, so I'm trying to be prepared.  How do you spend your days off?

Dear 2011, Let's Be Friends.

I am really excited for this year.  No seriously, I am!  I know every year people say the same things "This year is going to be my year."  "I am so excited to turn a new leaf!"  "Hooray for fresh starts!"  But this year really and truly does feel special to me.  There is just so much to look forward to.  So many things I'm excited to do and be part of.   Here is what I'm looking forward to in 2011.

Spring Semester 2011.  I know.  I know.  I really do know.  I am a giant dork - but I can't help being excited about my classes this semester.  I'm in Level 6 for both ballet and modern!  And I'll be taking Pointe Technique and variations.  I'm also supposed to drop in on Jazz 5 while I'm at it!  I'm curious about Dance Composition - everyone I talked to who had the faculty member I'll be learning from loved the class.  And I'm finally in Comparative Religions, a topic that I've always been interested in. . . and Honors Colloquium looks like an absolute ball.  I love the idea of the class, I love everyone I know I'll be taking the class with, and I love the Prof.  Perfect combination!

The Kennedy Center American College Theater Festival, usually called "the Kennedy Festival," or just "Festival."  It's a week long gathering of colleges and theater departments from all across the region.  Months before the actual festival, respondents are sent out to colleges and universities, to watch musicals and comedies, dramas, and tragedies.  The best of them are called to Festival to perform to large crowds and compete for the chance to go to the NATIONAL Festival.   The drama I was part of was held - meaning we're on the list of possible performers, and will be finding out soon if we get to compete!  There are workshops and master classes in every kind of stage craft you can imagine - stage combat, make up, etc.  There are mini-auditions for mini-productions.  There is a lot of laughing.  I am SO excited.

Two weddings.  The first one is this February, when this amazing couple tie the knot.  I know the ceremony will be a complete tear jerker, and I have seen the bride's dress.  It. Is. Stunning.

The bride for the second wedding is my life-long friend.  I've known her since before I can remember - and I am so excited for her mountain-top wedding to her Marine Corps sweetheart.  A sweet summer wedding for one of the sweetest - and toughest - women I've ever met.

Then there is Spring Break.  I have never in my life been outside the country, and this year I get to!  I am flying first class (thanks to some generous and loving relatives!) to Trinidad and Tobago for Carnival!  I'm going to be part of the street parading and celebrating as part of the band (meaning group, not musicians) Tribe.  This is my costume!  And I'll be spending the time with two of my closest girlfriends!

A few days later, I turn 21.  Not such a big deal, since I don't drink. . . but somehow, it still feels like an important, big girl, moment.

Hopefully, I'll be earning my Associate's Degree.  *Crosses Fingers*  I just have to sort out one last class.  One. Last. Class.

Finding out where I am spending the next four years.  Right now I've applied to Fordham University/the Ailey School, Barnard College, and my own current school.  I would be happy at any of the three, although right now Barnard and right-where-I-am are the most likely options.  It's a matter of finding out where I can get in, and what I can afford, and what will be the best option long term - financially, emotionally, etc.

Starting to rehearse with a real, professional company!

Getting more of my work published . . . I think it's about time I treat writing as well as I treat my other passions.

A summer job I'll love, taking care of two of the cutest children on the entire planet.

Hopefully celebrating another anniversary with Boyfriend.

Moving into a new house, with a new start.

What are YOU looking forward to in 2011?

60 MPH Winds

60 MPH winds.  That is what is screeching through my bedroom windows (my beautiful, picture windows, larger that my armspan.  That are set in the wall of my second story room, on this three-story-plus-finished-basement colonial house.).  Whipping the trees all around campus into a frenzy.  Pounding into the speaker of my phone, so Mum asks if I am standing outside in the rain as I walk back from rehearsal.  It was 50 MPH winds earlier, tugging whisps of my hair from my neat bun.  Blowing against my bag-o-books and making it strain against my shoulder.  Driving autumn-gilded leaves and menacing clouds across the sky.

It's beautiful.  And loud.  And it feels so perfect tonight.  Because this is exactly how my life has been lately. . . gale force winds.  Everything blowing everywhere, and pressurepressurepressure.  Tonight I had rehearsal at 7.  And rehearsal at 7.  Two different choreographers, two different pieces, styles, and rehearsal locations. . . then I had rehearsal at 8, for a third somebody.  And rehearsal at 9. . .

Exams, tests, quizzes, journal entries, homework, reading, notes, notes, NOTES.  choreography, new choreography, dance journal.  Gym. Trainers.  Creating blogs, giving tours, maintaing websites, attending club meetings, sending club-and-business emails.  office work.  memorizing lines.

A whirlwind life.  But I like whirlwinds.  I like the music they make.  I suppose tonight could be described as having "howling winds."  Howling seems negative and frightening, though.  Though it is loud and tumultuous it's also natural, carry-you-away music.  And  I find it so intriguing, what a windy day does to people. . . who hunches their shoulders and tucks their head and scuttles along.  Who marches purposefully, scarf fluttering behind them, rain boots briskly chewing up sidewalk.  The ballerina's bun pulled piece-by-piece apart, until strands of hair tumble loose around her face.  The couples where one person walks slightly ahead, his body shielding hers as she presses to her side, neither of them cognizant of their positioning.

So to I find a melodic feel to this hasty, crazy life.  Rehearsal-to-rehearsal, meals hastily grabbed in between.  Showering while reviewing history dates, stretching with a script in my lap, always having my cell phone, id/room key, a pencil, and a highlighter before starting the day.  A few quite minutes, stolen in a corner of the kitchen as my roommate sleeps floors above, a phone held close to my ear, a stillness finally letting my tight shoulder lower.

For now I will dance in the wind.